If you have children, divorce is merely the first step in your new living arrangement. It is likely that you will be in a joint custody situation with your ex-spouse after you finalize the divorce.
Traditionally, the children move between households after a divorce. However, in some situations, this is not the best choice. Many families are experimenting with a new living situation: “nesting.” Nesting is unique as it involves the children staying in one household and the parents doing the moving instead.
Why would we choose this?
In many situations, nesting is the default at the beginning of the divorce. This is when the parents may want space from each other, but they do not want to disrupt the lives of their children so soon. After a divorce, some parents choose nesting as the most peaceable arrangement. With older children, you may encounter resistance from them concerning moving frequently between households.
Additionally, families who live in expensive neighborhoods may need to continue to maintain a single household if they want the children to stay in the same school district. Families who have children with special needs often choose a nesting environment as it is safest for the child. There is no risk of somebody forgetting vital medication or equipment and if the child is staying in one residence.
What should we consider before doing this?
Nesting is not a good arrangement for high-conflict ex-couples. This is because you will still need to work together in order to maintain the family home. It requires extremely good communication and collaboration. If you and your ex-spouse cannot have a conversation without an argument, you should not pursue nesting.